Who's your favorite uncle?

Reports of Uncle Sam robbing convenience stores bounced around until they cornered him in a tree house behind a dumpy trailer. The policeman smirked over the speaker, “I WANT YOU to come down from there.”

A purple minivan pulled up and a young mother stepped out. She took in the scene, inhaled, and yelled, “YOU BETTER GET YOUR BUTT INSIDE BEFORE I GET UP THERE.”

The thief sprang from his tree. Halfway across the lawn, the wig fell to the ground.

The boy returned the money. His mother was upset, but laughed. “I WANT YOU to go to your room.”